Strange Behaviour

I think the consumption of fruit is strange. Unless it’s a tomato or avocado, I’m not interested. And I haven’t developed scurvy yet, so that means eating fruit is not a major part of human survival. I don’t have time to waste on fruit either.

Fruit contains seeds and avoiding or ingesting the seeds is way too much effort. If I’m going to eat something healthy, I want it to be easy.

Why people choose to eat this stuff if more than I can understand

That’s why I cannot understand why the girls at the office eat fruit salad for lunch.

If you’re going to eat fruit salad, it should at least be for breakfast. Restaurants are onto this fact. Why do you think you can only order fruit salad up until 10:00am? Because it doesn’t make sense to eat it at all, but some freaks do, so it’s just there, along with muesli and yogurt (seriously, who goes out for breakfast and eats muesli and yogurt?).

Really? You can't make this at home?

The girls already think I’m a freak. So, I can’t appeal to them to stop eating fruit at lunchtime. They don’t understand that I find it confusing.

Lunch, in an ideal world, would be steak. Something big and filling to get you through the day.

The perfect lunch



Strange Behaviour


My latest obsession is Ramen.

And I have lost interest in garage pies and sandwiches so it’s now my standard lunch.

My fascination with Ramen started a few years back when I was watching about 17 hours of Naruto a day. Naruto loves Ramen. Naruto is also a ninja and that means he is automatically more cool than anyone else. This means Ramen has to be awesome even though I am still not entirely sure what it actually is.

Little Ninja eating Ramen

And when I go to a Japanese restaurant I eat sushi. End of story. So I have limited education on this subject.

Ramen looks like this

But the Asian store with cheap tofu has a shelf of Ramen. Packet Ramen that cooks in two minutes. Maybe. There are no English cooking instructions on the Ramen, so there is a chance I’m eating half-cooked Ramen. But if you lift the flap where the plastic seals you can find English ingredients. These vary from bits-o-squid (I don’t buy this flavour) to seaweed (I will eat seaweed) and dehydrated bacon (not so sure about this). And then, while it’s nuking in the microwave you can find the warning ‘Super Spicy!’. This is announced in small print, but sounds triumphant to me. It’s a weak claim.

The Ramen I eat

My major concern with packet-Ramen is that it contains the following:

Sodium – 35g

Flavouring – containing 1000mg of sodium

Noodles – containing more sodium

So it’s not that nutritious and this confirms that ninjas don’t get their speed, agility and awesomeness from packet Ramen. And neither do I.

I’m still obsessed with Ramen though. I think about it for about an hour a day before I get up to prepare it. And early week Ramen is the best because I have several packets to choose from and I love making lunch decisions. Thursdays are not so great.

And just like that it finds its way onto my bucket list. I have to eat real Ramen before I die. Like Naruto does. Because it looks awesome. And it is less likely to give me a heart-attack.