A few weeks ago Climate Change decided to mix things up a little and bypass spring entirely. We had about two weeks of gorgeous summer weather and all the plants grew with as much enthusiasm as un-watered plants can grow. But Climate Change likes to keep us on our toes and threw in a few mild to cool days.
And in September the August winds started. I think this was deliberate. Climate Change is angry with us for destroying our planet and is punishing everything with lungs by depositing large amount of pollen into the air.
And at work we have The Libido Tree.
It’s big and pretty with lovely yellow flowers everywhere. It also has impeccable timing. On the windiest day of the month it was ready to release its pollen.
Just before it had shaken out enough to cover our desks, laptops and clothing with fine yellow dust it confused us by blocking our noses and giving us red, streaming eyes. Then we realised what was happening and the sudden office outbreak of spring flu was written off as a hoax.
The office manager, ML said she was glad she was on the pill because there was enough pollen in the air for cross species fertilisation. I am not on the pill and was genuinely concerned about being fertilized by The Libido Tree, that is how determined it was to spread itself around.
I have known a few loose people in my life, but none can compare to The Libido Tree. It was being a slut everywhere the wind would take it. It didn’t even need to be coaxed into action with a little liquor. It would simply have its way with anything and everything.
It’s a good thing cross species pollination plays in the realm of science fiction. For about a week I was almost happy to live in this universe and not in some exciting parallel with laser guns and space travel. I was happy that there was no chance of running into an alien with nine arms at the bar.
Fortunately it was just a phase in The Libido Tree’s lifecycle. It has since settled into a more mature plant and just stands in the back looking pretty.