I have this fantasy where I live in an apathetic society.
It’s possible to buy marshmallow chocolate eggs again. They come in strip packs or can be purchased individually. They aren’t particularly tasty, and we have about 50 left in the office from last year. The synthetic, sugary insides have become so hard that the eggs can be used as weapons. Or as building material for some uninspired architect that doesn’t want to be awesome and design an eco-friend Hobbit House.
Between that and the heart shaped sweets for Valentines day, I have no idea what to celebrate (and by celebrate I mean waste my money on) anymore. Two weeks ago, shops still had Christmas decor up. Now they are plugging romance and bunnies. Consumers don’t even get a holiday to recover from the excessive Christmas spending before they feel forced to get into the next big event.
Here are some special day and special day related facts:
Jesus wasn’t born on the 25th of December.
The Easter Bunny isn’t real.
Chocolate makes you fat.
And when I see a lot of the colour red, I think about meat. So, all I actually want to do most of the time is eat lamb chops and bacon. I don’t want to buy chocolates or roses. I don’t want diamond earrings or perfume. I wouldn’t mind a unicorn, but this is the appropriate time of the year.
But why can’t we all just live? Why do we always have to prepare for some occasion?
I am currently hanging out in the Free State. Farm country; and the only thing people here talk about is the price of lamb, how much rain there has been, when the next rain will come and whether or not they should spray Round Up on those invader trees down by the river. It’s fantastic fun.
The Free State is also the place where a lot of meat comes from. The perfect place for a carnivorous young woman to spend her vacation? Not really and here is why:
Just because steak can be grown in the Free State does not mean you will find good steak in the Free State. The meat is here is cheaper than in the city, because of transport costs and, a little secret, all the good steak goes to Johannesburg. And once it’s there, it’s tricky to get hold of, but always worth the effort. For obvious reasons, you can’t grow good steak in Johannesburg. It’s not a great place to raise a good piece of meat – too much noise and pollution and no room for the steak to mature. This makes places outside of Johannesburg necessary and very important for the enjoyment of steak.
It’s too bad really. The Free State has the potential to produce good steak, but it fails miserably. There isn’t that much to do, so from a very young age everyone eats a whole lot of meat, but it’s not good meat. It’s really boring, talentless meat. But because the locals don’t know any better, they spend their lives indulging in low grade beef and often relish in its toughness. So everyone goes about their daily lives without knowing what a great steak tastes like. And this makes me very sad for the average Free State dweller.
I’ve been here for just over a week now and I find myself missing steak. I dream about steak at night sometimes, I think about it during the day… All of this even though I can have as much meat as I want. It’s easy to find and requires little effort to prepare. But it’s just not the same. Once you have had good steak, you just want more of it.
The American doesn’t eat tomatoes. Not on pizza, not in pasta, no tomato sauce – nothing. Anything red results in nose wrinkling and the look of a cornered animal about to be shot and skinned. Not even my irresistible puppy-face can convince otherwise.
And this is a bit of a problem in our relationship. Because I love them. And it’s about the only fruit that I will actually eat. And since the American doesn’t eat much meat, the dinners I can make are limited. As far as I am concerned, all the tastiest vegetarian meals contain tomato.
The American subscribes to my blog (because it’s important to know what I do on the internet) and will read this, so Dear American (and all other tomato haters), please consider the below.
A tomato is a pretty thing.
It’s red and shiny and looks great in a crowd.
It looks like a marijuana plant without the fruit.
It’s versatile in its uses.
It contains vitamins and prevents scurvy. I read somewhere that it increases the natural sun defence of human skin. And I know people who drink it as a hangover cure. It contains anti-oxidant goodness. So combined with the sun protection is likely the fountain of youth, if only people would consume more of it.